10 Ways You May Be Seeding Your Own Chaos

Life is full of stuff we can’t control, both big stuff and little stuff that can create chaos in our lives, work, and relationships. This reality just makes it that much more imperative that we avoid creating more chaos-inducing stuff for ourselves – that we control what we can control knowing that little choices today can create (or help avoid) big chaos tomorrow.

The goal is not to pretend we can avoid chaos altogether. I don’t think that’s life. The goal is to keep our chaos “resting state” at a level that gives us capacity to manage when the uncontrollable things hit. Managing our resting state then demands daily diligence and discipline around the little, controllable things.

So, here are 10 ways you may be creating chaos today for your self tomorrow:
​
1. Not taking care of your mental health:​
Whether it’s managing stress, anxiety, Depression, grief, trauma, or otherwise, if you’re not managing it (or at least giving your best effort), it’s managing you and all of your relationships and work.

2. Not taking care of your physical health:
Whether it’s exercise or sleep or what you eat, it impacts how you relate and respond to the world - adding chaos or neutralizing it.

3. Avoiding difficult decisions:
Decisions that need to get made but don’t only get bigger and more complex in time. And, they don’t get easier or less necessary.

4. Avoiding difficult conversations:
Conversations that need to be had but aren’t only get bigger and more complex in time. And, they don’t get easier or less necessary.

5. Not monitoring and managing your relationships:
Relationships are dynamic and need tending to. Some relationships need more investment, some need less, and some you probably need to just let go of.

6. Cutting corners:
When you sacrifice quality or completeness whether in work, relationships, or otherwise because you think you don’t have time or the energy to do things fully, it will almost always pay you back with a chaos flywheel.

7. Not defining and keeping your boundaries:
People who can’t say “no” eventually create chaos for everyone around them.

8. Needing to be a fixer:
Helping others is good. Enabling their chaos creation is not. Thinking you can fix their chaos only ensures you are now a part of it.

9. Being vague or ambiguous about your needs:
Uncertainty in relationships or expectations breeds behavior, investment, and performance that are uncertain.

10. Failing to relentlessly prioritize:
​There is never enough time and yet we all have the same amount of it. We don’t find time or create it. We only prioritize it.


Image: https://www.freepik.com/premium-vector/chaos-mess-circle-continuous-line-drawing_346070449.htm