ANDERSON W. WILLIAMS
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A Communion of Broken Glass

3/8/2020

10 Comments

 
Picture
This morning, in many ways, I had my first Communion. Well, let me clarify: I had my first Communion that I felt I could truly believe in - with full heart, mind, intellect, emotion, lived reality, and faith.

Growing up as a Christian, I have been through all of the key sacraments and milestones. Communion did, however, take two tries because as a Protestant in Catholic School, I was denied my first Communion when all of my peers prepared for and received theirs. I sat in the back pew and waited while they presumably opened their doors to heaven. I crossed that milestone as a Methodist some years later with markedly less fanfare.

I never really resented my presumed lack of salvation in the Catholic Church - presumed damnation depending on how you chose to look at it. I just knew something didn’t make sense in my mind that as an 8 year old child I was denied this central symbol of the Christian Church while my peers partook. And, even as a child, I understood what its denial meant according to the faith of the people around me.

Not for that reason only, but for the life I lived and the family I was raised in, faith usually didn’t cut it for my connection with a higher power. Action was what mattered. People - all people - are what mattered. Living the right life was what I could control and living the wrong one could never be overcome by quoting scripture or proselytizing my faith.

This morning, I attended Church where a Church barely stood. I attended East End United Methodist’s service outside, in the grass, on a beautiful morning, with the tornado-torn bones of the old Church and the exposed rafters of its roof looming over us. I attended Church with several hundred neighbors, some of whom were members of the Church, many of whom just needed to gather after the tornado to be part of a community, to connect and find comfort.

I still don’t connect much with scripture. I love the music and I do like a good and thought-provoking sermon. Today, more than anything, I loved being among people who all in our own ways are struggling with the tragedy of the week - whether our own tragedy or that of our neighbor or the tragedy of the loss of a Church.

As the service wrapped up, the minister announced that in lieu of the sacrament of Communion, they would be passing out pieces of the broken glass from their shattered stained glass window - which until Tuesday told the story in light and glass and color of Christian Communion. The shattered shards they passed out even mirrored that of the broken Eucharist in my memory. This simple, beautiful, creative act amid destruction took my recent reflections on the Art of Church to a whole new level. In fact, this loving act, this sharing, this humble gesture, told the story of Christianity better than the window in its wholeness ever could have.

It also didn’t require faith to believe. It was a symbol of the present. It was a symbol of the basic human brokenness we are all experiencing. It was a remnant of human creativity and storytelling and inspiration. It was the sharing of brokenness as a means of bringing us together.

This is Church to me. This was a sacrament that I understand, and that I can believe in. I didn’t need Christian faith to find its transcendence. I have people. I have love. I have art. I have community. And, I have faith in these things.

Communion.
​


10 Comments
Cheryl Stone
3/8/2020 08:07:25 pm

Thank you so much for coming to be with us today. Your writing is beautiful and most appreciated. I am so glad you had this experience.

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Linda Benjamin
3/8/2020 10:06:20 pm

Thank you for your beautiful words. You expressed , so well, the feeling of community today and the healing that the gathering this morning started.

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Joy Lawler
3/9/2020 04:15:23 am

22 years ago I was there. People of faith were at Eastwood Christian helping us in so many ways. A great many were Methodists, including myself, as we were cleaning up after that tornado damaged Eastwood, where my husband was pastor. My heart broke in half when I saw the pictures of East End UMC Tuesday at dawn. Thank you for writing this, Anderson. I am not sure if I have ever felt the power of Communion in such a real way. 💔✝️❤️

Reply
Rev. Ashley Calhoun
3/9/2020 12:53:54 pm

Thank you for this thought-provoking, moving post. The whole experience has redefined the power and meaning of Holy Communion. Many years ago I helped The Red. Dr. Heather Murray Elkins with a similar powerful visual for the ministers of the Holston Conference of the UMC held at Lake Junaluska, NC. The theme of the convocation was brokenness and healing. We helpers wrapped scraps of stained glass in pages of scripture from a Good News Bible. During the first service baskets of the wrapped glass were passed and participants were encouraged to take one. With each service Heather layered that glass with meaning, encouraging us to identify the things causing us hurt and to symbolically place them on the glass. The last service was a healing service in which we were encouraged to symbolically turn our hurts over to Christ for healing by laying them on the altar at the front of the room. Afterwards I learned that many had shared their stories with Heather privately including our bishop who was rather freaked because when he unwrapped the page of scripture from the glass it was the text he was planning to use for his closing sermon! He wanted to know how that had been arranged. She shrugged and said, "There was no way we could have arranged that. You were sitting in the crowd and picked out the piece yourself." He was really shaken by that. Heather told me there were some who shared they weren't able to let go of their pain so didn't place the piece on the altar. Afterwards people also asked her what was going to happen to the glass because they wanted to be sure it wouldn't be simply thrown away. Heather then asked me as liturgical artist for the Holston Conference to put it in some form which would use all the pieces and not change the shape of any so that people could recognize their piece of glass when looking at it. She announced as we were having our last service that I would be doing that and would present it to the conference. I spent months trying to think of how to accomplish that assignment talking with various friends and stained glass artists. At last I settled on creating as stained glass window, but how? People were still coming up to be months later at Annual Conference to give me their pieces of glass explaining they had finally been able to release the pain and wanted their glass in whatever I created.

I have designed stained glass windows but am not an artist at that craft. In talking with an artist and owner of a stained glass studio if there was a way to adhere the glass to a piece of plate glass and explained my assignment. At first he said that would be difficult because something like Duco cement could easily break the seal and the pieces be lost. Then a light came on in his head and shone on his face. He said, "Clear caulk! it will hold for 50 plus years and remains malleable for several minutes before it dries, so you could even move a pieces around." That was exciting, but then what to use as a design? I tossed around ideas like trying to depict the movement of the Spirit in kind of an abstract design. Try as I might I couldn't make that work playing with the all the pieces laid out on a card table. Frustrated and interested in their ideas I explained my assignment and asked each of our sons, aged 10 and 12, what they would do. Independently they each said, "Dad! A cross!". Of course, what a perfect symbol of brokenness and healing!! Our of the mouth of babes!

Wouldn't you know every last piece worked together to form the image of the cross; the body of the cross with clear glass pieces forming light bursting forth from it and the rest forming the background which happened to form a perfect three foot square. Then I asked a member of the church I was serving to make a frame and a stand for the window which he glad did and beautifully. The following February I shared the stained glass window with the attendees at the next Convocation using it as the centerpiece for the altar setting which I arranged. For a few years afterward I always brought the window to have as a visual and a reminder. The window was also borrowed by Judy Loehr, Dr. Evelyn Laycock, and others for various teaching missions and conferences. In all its travels only one tiny piece of glass has been lost. I still have the window and use it off and on over the years during Lent in churches I've served and now in retirement at Long's Chapel UMC near Lake Junaluska,, so it's back home, so to speak.

Many blessings,

Rev. Ashley M. Calhoun

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Cheryl A Stone
3/10/2020 06:23:23 am

I would SO love to see a photo of the finished cross. Many of us have several pieces of glass, and I am struggling with what to do with mine. A pendant? A Christmas ornament? A cross in a shadow box? Perhaps we could ALL put them to use for our new church (because we will have to rebuild)!

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Glen Biggs link
3/9/2020 04:41:52 pm

Hey Anderson, Dude~! This is written to absolute perfection and captures a lot of myself.and so many others. After being out of the church for over 25 years, I have slowly re-entered the doors to a sanctuary and worshipped with others. I found that magical place at East End Methodist. Johnny and I became members there 4 years ago. I have never felt what I feel when in that building, with those people. Although I didn't physically see you, I was there yesterday and I shared communion with you among all the heart-breaking rubble.

Soooo.....Some friends were at my house last night and we shared about the building, the community, the park and the glass....I cried again. One of those friends found your blog on FB and sent it to me this evening. WOWOWOW....was all I could say. That and, wait....I know this Anderson and I have for a long time. I did not know about your artist side which I also share with you. Amazing, Amazing~! Thank you for your words. They really spoke to me.

Namaste~! Glen

Reply
Anderson
3/9/2020 06:00:33 pm

Thanks for the kind words, Glen. I hope you guys are safe and secure. And I’m glad to know my experience resonated. That’s pretty much why I write - in hopes that it does. Best.

Reply
LINDA EDWARDS
3/10/2020 02:45:35 pm

Thank you so much for this reflection on the service Sunday. I was there as well and this captures it perfectly for me.

Reply
Dawn
3/11/2020 09:47:51 am

Beautifully written! Thank you for this, we used to attend East End but recently moved away and have been keeping up with all the news online. To know that these pieces are in good hands means a lot.

Reply
Julius link
2/19/2025 09:37:05 pm

Your reflection on A Communion of Broken Glass is deeply moving and profoundly insightful. The way you weave personal experience with broader themes of resilience, connection, and meaning is truly compelling. Your writing not only engages but also challenges readers to see beauty and significance even in brokenness. An excellent and thought-provoking piece!

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